This Is a fan-based Biography of an immortal Icon that represents badasses around the world who is Chuck Norris!!
Very Short Bio:
Carlos Ray "Chuck" Norris (born March 10, 1940) is an American martial artist and actor. After serving in the United States Air Force, he began his rise to fame as a martial artist and has since founded his own school, Chun Kuk Do.
Norris created the martial art Chun Kuk Do, which is based primarily on Tang Soo Do and includes elements from every combat style he knows. Like many other martial arts, Chun Kuk Do includes a code of honor and rules to live by. These rules are from Chuck Norris's personal code. They are:
- I will develop myself to the maximum of my potential in all ways.
- I will forget the mistakes of the past and press on to greater achievements.
- I will continually work at developing love, happiness and loyalty in my family.
- I will look for the good in all people and make them feel worthwhile.
- If I have nothing good to say about a person, I will say nothing.
- I will always be as enthusiastic about the success of others as I am about my own.
- I will maintain an attitude of open-mindedness.
- I will maintain respect for those in authority and demonstrate this respect at all times.
- I will always remain loyal to my God, my country, family and my friends.
- I will remain highly goal-oriented throughout my life because that positive attitude helps my family, my country and myself.
Cars were invented to have a faster way of fleeing from Chuck Norris. Not to be outdone, Chuck Norris invented the car accident.
The First Law of Thermodynamics states that energy can neither be created nor destroyed... unless it meets Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris had to stop washing his clothes in the ocean. The tsunamis were killing people.
Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise.
Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.
Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its decendants are known today as Giraffes.
Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.
Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer
Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise.
Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves.
Chuck Norris can divide by zero
Chuck Norris knows the last digit of pi.
Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch. HE decides what time it is.
Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
Google won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you.
The original title for Alien vs. Predator was Alien and Predator vs Chuck Norris.
If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever.
When Chuck Norris was born, the only person who cried was the doctor. Never slap Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink.
When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.
According to Einstein's theory of relativity, Chuck Norris can actually roundhouse kick you yesterday.
Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
We live in an expanding universe. All of it is trying to get away from Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris sleeps with a pillow under his gun.
He, who laughs last, laughs best. He who laughs at Chuck Norris … dies.
Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.
Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time.
He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoloy card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.
Chuck Norris invented black. In fact he invented the entire spectrum of visible light. Except pink. Tom Cruise invented pink.
In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.
Aliens DO indeed exist. They just know better than to visit a planet that Chuck Norris is on.
If at first you don't succeed, you're not Chuck Norris.
When Bruce Banner gets mad, he turns into the Hulk. When the Hulk gets mad, he turns into Chuck Norris.
It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.
Chuck Norris CAN believe it's not butter.
Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
When Chuck Norris plays Monopoly, it affects the actual world economy.
Human cloning is outlawed because if Chuck Norris were cloned, then it would be possible for a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick to meet another chuck Norris roundhouse kick.
Physicists theorize that this contact would end the universe.
Chuck Norris has to use a stunt double when he does crying scenes.
Chuck Norris' first job was as a paperboy. There were no survivors.
A Handicapped parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
People created the automobile to escape from Chuck Norris... Not to be outdone, Chuck Norris created the automobile accident.
The quickest way to a man's heart is with Chuck Norris' fist.
What was going through the minds of all of Chuck Norris' victims before they died? His shoe.
Chuck Norris crossed the road. No one has ever dared question his motives.
Chuck Norris' hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.
Chuck Norris gallery:
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| So the rumors ARE true... |
Videos:
funny CHUCK NORRIS drink commercial
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